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Boy, Bye!

How many times have you fallen down the internet/social media rabbit hole while lounging in bed or sitting and doing nothing? I have done it multiple times. In one of those times I came across comments and critiques and hashtags of a black man who considers himself a lifestyle coach and image consultant. After scrolling and reading, I went to the Instagram page of that person. It was no surprise that he is single with a vast number of followers. Also, from what I gathered, he's divorced.

I will now begin my ranting of opinions and perspectives......

Ladies, if a man who is single and not in a productive, loving, and nurturing relationship can give you advice on how you should look, think, and feel, then I recommend you re-assess your life. (No disrespect intended) This man belittles women. He blatantly shows disdain for women. He puts the emotions and feelings of women on display in an effort to publicly denigrate them for his own gain. He tells women that they are not deserving of the person they believe for themselves. He shares these ill-thought ideals of the "modern woman" and the "high value man". He uses these ideals to describe who women deserve based on the way they carry themselves, their weight, and/or the lifestyle they live. Really?!?!! I don't deserve a strong man because I am over weight? Boy bye! I need a strong man to pick me up when I fall!

In my opinion, this wanna be coach manipulates and plays on the insecurities of some women. He preys on their vulnerability. He tends to use derogatory language when a woman stands up to him or dare disagrees with his thoughts. Who is he coaching? What image is he "consulting"? In what world does any self-respecting man crush the spirits of a woman? Why are women his primary target? He is not, in my opinion, a man of faith. He is not Holy.

Romans 15: 1-2 We who are strong have an obligation to bear with the failings of the weak, and not to please ourselves. Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, to build him up.

Women, the bible tells us that "he who finds a wife finds a good thing". In my opinion, this means that the man God sends and the one who believes you to be his good thing is the man for you. You are the good thing. The good is not based on your past. It's not based on the length or texture of your hair. It's not your height or the size of your thighs. The good thing is who you are, what you believe, and what you offer. The good is not how much money you make, the car you drive, or your material possessions. The good is you overcoming obstacles and standing up to challenges. The good thing is belief in yourself, belief in Christ, and belief in your ability to be a woman. The good thing is your spiritual and internal wealth.

Be good to yourself. Be grateful for what you have and who you have become. Be a faithful steward to God. I am not proclaiming myself to be the most righteous person, but I know I am a believer in Christ. I pray to God. I pray for knowledge and discernment in my life - which includes my relationships. I know that I have a great deal to offer. I know that with God all things are possible. Those things include having who and what I desire and the person who truly desires the WHOLE me.

Ladies, don't allow some insta-famous man to validate your being. Don't allow self-proclaimed experts to tell you what you can have. A blue check mark means nothing when it comes to certifications and qualifications. Don't allow the opinions of a counterfeit coach to penetrate your thoughts and diminish your confidence.

Woman you are beautiful. Woman you are powerful. Woman you are deserving. Woman you are phenomenal.

This is just my juxtaposition of a man who is critical of a woman and a real man who is complimentary and deserving of one.

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